McCain Thanks the Clintons

I traveled to an alternate universe, and heard candidate John McCain thank former President Bill Clinton and Senator Hillary Clinton for their 'left handed' endorsement of his candidacy. At a campaign fundraiser for 'Liberals who don't trust Clinton' McCain said:

"We wish to thank former President Bill Clinton, and Senator Hillary Clinton, for their support, however, we wish to point out that we are the only candidate really capable of being Commander-in-Chief. We feel that WE are the man for the job.

"Obama may be young, bright, and eloquent, and he may really understand the problems of today and the solutions that will position us in the future, but since he is about half our age, and he talks in the first person, not the third person, and most important since this is our last chance for the Presidency, we feel that Obama is not the man for the job.

"While she is closer to us in age, and less comfortable in front of crowds, and need I say it, female, we also feel that Hillary Clinton isn't the man for the job.

"And as for the difference between Sunnis and Shiites, who cares? We can't tell the difference. It's like the difference between the North Vietnamese and South Vietnamese, or the Vietnamese, the Chinese, the Koreans, and the Japs. They claim there's a difference, they may be able to tell the difference, but who really cares?"